This needlepoint started as a quick doodle. I did a more exact drawing straight onto the needlepoint canvas and went from there.
It has a very mid-century aesthetic. I love the clean and simple lines.
Having read the War of Art, I know that feeling like giving up is normal. I know to push through it now. When I was working on this watercolor the question I asked myself was “How much and how strong of that feeling is normal?” Because I didn’t feel it like a whisper, but deafening trumpet while I was painting this. A “Why do I even bother, what am I thinking, I should just give this up” constant feeling. So far I have felt that way each time I tackle a painting. Sometimes it is not as strong and I can get past it sooner, say fifty percent of the time. I swear I felt that way during this piece about nintey two percent of the time. Painting it felt more like a struggle than relaxing and enjoyable. I am hoping that comes from being so new and not really knowing what I am doing. Somehow at the end I felt, “Okay. That isn’t horrible. That’s decent.” And then when it was done I immediately got out a new piece of fresh paper to tackle another painting, the next “puzzle”. I really want to keep a documentation of the process of learning to paint, and how this inner dialogue plays out. I read one artist say recently “Finally after fourteen years I am painting the way I always dreamed.” That was both frightening and encouraging at the same moment. Frightening because I am not far in and I have a long way to go; encouraging because it’s helpful to know how long others have had to keep at it. Sitting in front of the paper with brushes in my hands is some of the happiest moments I have. With each new painting, the more I push through and “fight the resistance,” the harder it is to imagine my future without doing it. So I’ll cling to that!
This green and gray colored quilt I made using the Sunny Day Quilt pattern found here. The project took three or four years as I started for my son while I was still pregnant, put it aside, and didn’t pick it up until years later. He is four. So that makes it five years, but who’s counting? It’s a good thing I made it twin size because by the time I finished he is almost ready out of his toddler bed. I loved the print of this fabric that was a duvet cover from IKEA. I took it apart and conviently had a whole cloth piece for the back and tons of leftover fabric from the front. It is entirely handquilted. I love hand quilting. I have hand quilted since I was a girl. I remember during some long winter nights my mom clearing off the kitchen table after dinner and spreading a big quilt out over it. I would sit around it with her and my grandmother while we all worked on it together. It is easy, mindless, cathartic work. I much prefer the look of the finished product. It is time consuming though. As I get started I always wonder, what was I thinking? Both girls informed me that their baby quilts are now too small and could I please make them one this size? They put their orders in and now I a list of quilts to work on. Jude loves it. He would check in “Are done with my blankie yet?” It is so gratifying to wrap your baby up in something made with your hands!